Sue Scheff: Do You Know Where Your Teen Will Be this Summer?

By Aurelia - www.parentingmyteen.com

School’s Out for Summer: Do You Know Where Your Teen Will Be?

These are questions most parents face during the summertime. Perhaps both you and your husband work full time, or work at home. Whatever the case may be, your teen has a great deal of free time, which can either be utilized to increase their emotional and educational growth, or to engage in activities which may be the catalyst for potential trouble.

Let’s face it, for some teens the first day of summer is looked upon as a license to run wild with no cares in the world except their own. While every teen needs a few weeks to unwind, if there has been no advanced planning on what your teen can be doing during summertime, the door is open for them to waste time watching TV or playing video games or hooking up with friends and just hanging out at the beach. This is a great concern for parents who want their teens to increase their physical activity and mental prowess during the summer months in a safe environment.

What can parents do to ensure they are not only aware of where their teen will be, but what they will be doing?

If you are concerned about your teen this summer, it’s time to have a serious conversation wherein you set up a series of rules. Here are some tips which may help in this regard:

• Establish a curfew for your teen, both day and night.

• If you are a working parent, ask your teen what he or she will be doing during the day. Inform your teen that permission is required before they venture out.

• Remain in constant touch with your teen via a cell phone.

• Invited your teen’s friends over for a Saturday barbeque. This will allow you to get to know who your teen hangs out with.

• Set up a routine of chores your teen can help with at home, and for which he or she can earn extra money.

• Plan family outings to museums or places of interest on the weekends.

• Take your teen to the library and choose a number of books to read over the summer. Since this is a requirement of most public schools, encouraging your teen to expand his or knowledge will help them advance in school as well.

• Limit the amount of TV and computer time. Use parental controls, which are part of all Internet service providers.

• If you are a working parent, plan a week’s vacation for the entire family. You can either choose a destination that has a great deal of history, or a place in which the family can spend quality time together and reestablish the family unit.

Summertime for teens can either be a safe, fun-filled experience, or it can be a time where worry is your constant enemy. Open communication with your teen is not only important, but is paramount in continuing parental control over your teen in every facet of their growth. While your teen may not like it now, they will thank you later.

Visit parenting my teen to plan For the Perfect Teen Summer and gain more ideas on keeping your teen out of trouble, motivated and learning during the summer.

Sue Scheff: Love Our Children USA

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff): Love our Children USA offers help for kids and parents today with all the issues they face. Bullying, cyberbullying and school violence is part of what our children may face. Learn more here.

After appearing on The Rachael Ray Show with spokesperson of Love Our Children USA and Miss Teen New Jersey International 2007, Krysten Moore, I recommend parents and teens alike to visit this website if you are struggling with today's peer group issues including cyberbullying.

Sue Scheff: Inhalant Abuse - Warning Signs

Inhalant Abuse is a lesser-known form of substance abuse, but is no less dangerous than other forms.The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Service has reported that more than 2.1 million children in America experiment with some form of an inhalant each year and the Centers for Disease Control lists inhalants as second only to marijuana for illicit drug use among youth.

However, parents aren't talking to their children about this deadly issue. According to the Alliance for Consumer Education's research study, Inhalant Abuse falls behind alcohol, tobacco and marijuana use by nearly 50% in terms of parental knowledge and concern. The Partnership for a Drug-Free America reports that 18 percent of all eighth graders have used inhalants, but nine out of 10 parents are unaware or deny that their children have abused inhalants. Many parents are not aware that inhalant users can die the first time they try Inhalants.

Sudden Sniffing Death Syndrome is caused in one of two ways. First, Inhalants force the heart to beat rapidly and erratically until the user goes into cardiac arrest. Second, the fumes from an Inhalant enter a user's lungs and central nervous system. By lowering oxygen levels enough, the user is unable to breathe and suffocates. Regular abuse of these substances can result in serious harm to vital organs including the brain, heart, kidneys and liver.

Even if the user doesn't die, Inhalants can still affect the body. Most Inhalants produce a rapid high that resembles alcohol intoxication with initial excitement, then drowsiness, disinhibition, lightheadedness and agitation. Short-term effects include headache, muscle weakness, abdominal pain, severe mood swings and violent behavior, slurred speech, numbness and tingling of the hands and feet, nausea, hearing loss, limb spasms, fatigue, and lack of coordination. Long- term effects include central nervous system or brain damage. Serious effects include damage to the liver, heart, kidneys, blood oxygen level depletion, unconsciousness and death.

Studies show that strong parental involvement in a child's life makes the child less likely to use Inhalants. Know the warning signs or behavior patterns to watch for and take the time to educate yourself about the issue so that you can talk to your children about inhalants.

Click here for entire article and warning signs http://www.inhalant.org/inhalant/warnings.php

www.inhalant.org
www.helpyourteens.com

Sue Scheff: Helping ADHD Children with Impulse Control: Smart Discipline

By ADDitude Magazine

Help children with ADHD think before they act by establishing clear expectations, positive incentives, and predictable consequences for good or bad behavior at school and home.
For children with attention deficit disorder (ADD ADHD) ruled by their impulses, calling out in class or pushing to the front of the line comes naturally. These kids live in the moment, undeterred by rules or consequences. Even when they are rude or unruly, they may not recognize that their behavior is disturbing to others.

Lack of impulse control may be the most difficult ADD symptom to change. Medication can help, but kids also need clear expectations, positive incentives, and predictable consequences if they are to learn to regulate their behavior.
Click here for entire article.

Sue Scheff: Teen Depression

A Relentless Hope: Surviving The Storm of Teen Depression
By Gary E. Nelson

(Published by Cascade Books, an imprint of Wipf & Stock, a traditional publisher)


Depression and related illnesses threaten to wreck the lives of many teens and their families. Suicide driven by these illnesses is one of the top killers of young people. How do teens become depressed? What does depression feel like? How can we identify it? What helps depressed teens? What hurts them? How do families cope with teen depression?

In, A Relentless Hope, Dr. Nelson uses his experience as a pastor and pastoral counselor to guide the reader through an exploration of these and many other questions about depression in teens. He's worked with many teens over the years offering help to those confronted by this potentially devastating illness. The author also uses the story of his own son's journey through depression to weave together insights into the spiritual, emotional, cognitive, biological, and relational dimensions of teen depression. The book is written for those without formal clinical training, so it appeals to teens, parents, teachers, pastors, and any who walk with the afflicted through this valley of the shadow of death. Through careful analysis, candid self-revelation, practical advice, and even humor, this pastor, counselor, and father, reminds us God's light of healing can shine through the darkness of depression and offer hope for struggling teens and their families.

Dr. Nelson is available for speaking engagements, workshops, and interviews. See the contact page for information about reaching him. http://survivingteendepression.com/index.html

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Your Child's Strengths by Jenifer Fox M.ED

By Jenifer Fox M.ED

One of the most important goals of the Strengths Movement is to equip parents with the tools they need to help children discover and leverage their strengths. As this site continues to grow and evolve, we will continue to add resources. If you know of a good resource which is not listed here, let us know and we will add it.
Learn More Click Here.

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As a parent advocate, this book and websites offer tremendous educational information for parents to help them with their child's strengths.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) The Feingold Diet and Program

The Feingold Program

Did you know that the brand of ice cream, cookie, and potato chip you select could have a direct effect on the behavior, health, and ability to learn for you or your children?

Numerous studies show that certain synthetic food additives can have serious learning, behavior, and/or health effects for sensitive people.

The Feingold Program (also known as the Feingold Diet) is a test to determine if certain foods or food additives are triggering particular symptoms. It is basically the way people used to eat before "hyperactivity" and "ADHD" became household words, and before asthma and chronic ear infections became so very common.
Read the entire article here.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Troubled Teens, Teen Depression, Teen Help

Are you struggling with your teen?

Visit http://www.helpyourteens.com/ P.U.R.E. - Parents Universal Resource Experts - Parents helping parents.

P.U.R.E. is based on reality - especially with today's teen society of technology including MySpace and other Internet concerns for children. Today we are educating children at much younger ages about substance abuse, sex, and more.

The latest wave of music and lyrics, television, and movies help to contribute to generate a new spin on this age group.

This leads to new areas of concern for parents. We recognize that each family is different with a variety of needs. P.U.R.E. believes in creating Parent Awareness to help you become an educated parent in the teen help industry.

We will give you a feeling of comfort in a situation that can be confusing, stressful, frustrating, and sometimes desperate.Desperate? Confused? Stressed? Anxious? Helplessness? Frustrated? Scared? Exhausted? Fearful? Alone? Drained? Hopelessness? Out of Control? At Wit's End?...

http://www.helpyourteens.com/
http://www.witsendbook.com/
http://www.suescheff.com/

Sue Scheff: Teen Drug, Salvia

By Connect with Kids


“They feel very out of control; it’s very scary. They will literally have blackouts, and what we are seeing is a lot of people having accidents because they lose their coordination. They aren’t able to think clearly, so we are seeing people fall, stumble, hurt themselves, and have driving accidents.”

– Heather Hayes, LPC, drug counselor

Today, more teenagers are smoking a powerful hallucinogenic herb that is native to Mexico. It is a potent drug, the effects are almost instantaneous, and because it is legal in most states, it has caught the attention of lawmakers around the country.

Henri and Thomas say they have a friend who’s tried it. It’s called Salvia.

“He smoked it, and then went to scratch his head … and can’t remember anything after that,” says Henri Hollis, 18.

Add Thomas Steed, 18, “His friend said he was just going like this [flailing his arms] for like 20 minutes straight.”

In most states, salvia is legal. However, the Drug Enforcement Agency (DEA) has salvia on its list of “Drugs and Chemicals of Concern.” On the streets and in head shops, salvia is also referred to as “magic mint,” “sally-d” and “diviner’s sage.”

“My friend just brought some over one day, and I was like, ‘Alright!’ says Nick Nehf, 18. “I mean, I’d never heard of it before, but he said he had bought it down the street at the head shop and I was like, ‘Alright, whatever.’”

“Salvia divinorum is a perennial herb that grows wild in Mexico. It’s a hallucinogenic. It’s what back in the 60s we used to call a psychedelic,” says Heather Hayes, licensed professional counselor (LPC) and drug counselor.

Experts say that salvia affects the brain nearly 10 times faster than cocaine, and targets the parts of the brain responsible for motor function.

“They feel very out of control; it’s very scary. They will literally have blackouts, and what we are seeing is a lot of people having accidents because they lose their coordination. They aren’t able to think clearly, so we are seeing people fall, stumble, hurt themselves, and have driving accidents,” says Hayes.

Many states are now considering legislation to ban salvia.

In the meantime, experts say, explain to your kids that just because something is temporarily legal doesn’t mean it is safe.

“Initially, when the drug Ecstasy was developed it was not illegal, but shortly after it was,” says Hayes. “And now we know that Ecstasy is extremely damaging to the brain -- we have people who die after one use. So that would be the analogy I’d give.”

“Anybody who I’ve talked to who has done it says they are never going to try it again because it was too much for them,” says Steed.

Tips for Parents

Partnership for a Drug-Free America and the Media Awareness Program offer these tips to help keep kids from using drugs:

It sounds simple, but one of the best ways to keep your kids drug-free is to show them you care. Simple gestures like an unexpected hug or saying ‘I love you" everyday can help kids gain the confidence to say no to drugs.

Look for teachable moments. Talk about a recent drug or alcohol-related incident in your family or community.

Explain the principles of "why" and not just "what" to do or not do.

Teach real-world coping skills: drug prevention can start by building a teen's confidence for a job interview or teaching a child how to rebuff a schoolmate who wants to copy homework.

Parents remain one of the strongest moral influences on kids, and they need to send a clear anti-drug message. Studies show that parental ambivalence increases a child's risk for drug use.

Focus on one drug at a time: there's strong evidence that media attention to harmful effects of specific drugs has made a difference.

For instance, a 1995 ad campaign about abuse of inhalants, such as paint thinners and glues, precipitated a drastic drop in use.

In 1986, cocaine use fell after extensive news reports on the death of Len Bias, a college-basketball star who died after using cocaine.

(Currently, Heath Ledger’s death has prompted drug rehabilitation for other celebrities as well as the general population.)

These examples illustrate the life cycle of a drug. Word of a drug's “benefits” spreads rapidly, but there is a lag time before kids learn about the dangers. Once the risks become apparent, occasional users drop the drug and potential new users don't try it. Parents and educators can make a difference if they pay attention to the life cycle of a newly popular drug and work to quickly spread the word about harmful effects.

Don't lecture: the use of lecturing is often cited as the single biggest flaw in the best-known and most popular anti-drug programs. Get kids more involved in the lesson, such as asking them to discuss how they'd react at a party where kids were drinking.

Repeat the message: the most successful anti-drug classes are those that are presented over the course of a child's school career.

References

Partnership for a Drug-Free America
Media Awareness Program

Sue Scheff - Teen Depression

Teenage depression is more than just bad moods or broken hearts; it is a very serious clinical illness that will affect approximately 20% of teens before they reach adulthood. Left untreated, depression can lead to difficult home situations, problems at school, drug abuse, and worse, violence toward themselves and others.

Learn more - click here.

Sue Scheff: Huffing Freon

As a parent advocate (Sue Scheff) I think there needs to be more awareness on inhalant use of today's kids. Huffing Freon can be so accessible to kids today - especially since I am in Florida - I think parents need to take time and learn more. www.inhalant.org is a good place to start.

Read More.

Sue Scheff - Parents Universal Resource Experts

P.U.R.E. is based on reality - especially with today's teen society of technology including MySpace and other Internet concerns for children. Today we are educating children at much younger ages about substance abuse, sex, and more. The latest wave of music and lyrics, television, and movies help to contribute to generate a new spin on this age group. This leads to new areas of concern for parents.

We recognize that each family is different with a variety of needs. P.U.R.E. believes in creating Parent Awareness to help you become an educated parent in the teen help industry. We will give you a feeling of comfort in a situation that can be confusing, stressful, frustrating, and sometimes desperate.

Desperate? Confused? Stressed? Anxious? Helplessness? Frustrated? Scared? Exhausted? Fearful? Alone? Drained? Hopelessness? Out of Control? At Wit's End?...

http://www.helpyourteens.com/
http://www.witsendbook.com/
http://www.suescheff.com/

Parents Universal Resouce Experts (Sue Scheff) Teen Drinking and Driving

By Connect with Kids

Shattered

It’s hard to get teens to really listen when adults talk to them about the dangers of drinking and driving. Your kids will listen to Shattered. The program features true stories from real teens whose lives were drastically changed as a result of drunk driving. Watch and learn together, and suddenly the pressure is off your own children as they relate to the kids onscreen. You won't be talking at your children... you'll be talking with them.

“I didn't think I’d ever be one of these people, you know, that drinks and drives and hurts people, but I am.” – Jayme Webb, her story, in Shattered

Shattered is a no-sugar-coated, heart-wrenching program, with facts and tips from experts to help parents and teens avoid the risks of drinking and driving.

“As teenagers, we always think we are invincible and nothing bad is ever going to happen to us,” says Whitney, 16. But bad things do happen. Nearly 3,000 teenagers die each year due to alcohol-related car accidents. It is the leading cause of death among 15- to 20-year-olds.

Comes with a free Family Viewing Guide with myth-busters about alcohol’s effects, sobering up, peer pressure, and resources to help you create a driving contract you’re your teens.

http://www.helpyourteens.com/
http://www.witsendbook.com/

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Teen Depression

Do you suspect your teen is suffering with depression?

Click here for more information.

Sue Scheff - "A Relentless Hope" A must read for parents suspecting their teen is suffering with depression

I just had another parent call today on how wonderful this book is. I read it when it was first published and have referred it since. Dr. Gary Nelson shares his story of his families struggles with their son's depression. It is a story of hope and inspiration - very well written.

If you have a teen today that you feel may be suffering with depression, this book can offer you great insight.

Sue Scheff: Teen Drug Testing

Visit this website for home drug testing for both urine and hair.

Parents are the #1 Reason Kids Don't Do Drugs.... Test with HairConfirm Drug Test for a 90 Day Drug History Report!

Sue Scheff: Parenting Out of Control Teens

Parent's Universal Resource Experts has found that children that have ODD (Oppositional Defiance Disorder) are very confrontational and need to have life their own way. A child does not have to be diagnosed ODD to be defiant. It is a trait that some teens experience through their puberty years.

Defiant teens, disrespectful teens, angry teens and rebellious teens can affect the entire family.An effective way to work with defiant teens is through anger and stress management classes. If you have a local therapist*, ask them if they offer these classes. Most will have them along with support groups and other beneficial classes.

In today's teens we are seeing that defiant teens have taken it to a new level. Especially if your child is also ADD/ADHD, the ODD combination can literally pull a family apart.You will find yourself wondering what you ever did to deserve the way your child is treating you. It is very sad, yet very real. Please know that many families are experiencing this feeling of destruction within their home. Many wonder "why" and unfortunately each child is different with a variety of issues they are dealing with. Once a child is placed into proper treatment, the healing process can begin.

If you feel your teen is in need of further Boarding School, Military School or Program Options, please complete our Information Request Form.

Do you have a struggling teen? At risk teens? Defiant Teen? Teen Depression? Problem Teen? Difficult Teen? Teen Rage? Teen Anger? Teen Drug Use? Teen Gangs? Teen Runaways? Bipolar? ADD/ADHD? Disrespectful Teen? Out of Control Teen? Peer Pressure?

Find about more about Boarding Schools, Military Schools, Christian Boarding Schools, Residential Treatment Centers, and Therapeutic Boarding Schools.

Parents Universal Resource Experts (Sue Scheff) Teens Flunk Personal Finance

By Connect with Kids

“It’s easy for these students to get the credit, go and buy a stereo, go and buy a television, go buy all this stuff that they want, and then all of sudden, they’re in a lot of debt.”

– Carol Pizza, economics teacher

Teenagers in the U.S. spend more than $150 billion a year, according to Teenage Research Unlimited (TRU), an organization that tracks teenage consumer behavior and attitudes. Yet, how much do teens today understand about basic finances such as saving, investing and borrowing? Not much, according to a new national survey.

In the survey, teens were asked several questions about money, including: If you lose your credit card, what’s your liability? Here’s how some high school students answered:

”One thousand dollars,” Blake guesses -- incorrectly.

”Five hundred dollars,” guesses David. Wrong again.

But Lauren answers correctly: “Fifty dollars.”

Next question: where will money grow the most over 18 years?

Lauren asks, “Savings account?”

Denise agrees: “Savings account.”

They are both wrong; Kelly gets it right: “Stocks.”

In a recent national survey, more than 6,000 12TH graders were tested, and they answered more than half of the questions incorrectly. College students also took the test this year, and they answered 38 percent of the questions incorrectly. Experts say that what teens don’t know about money can hurt them.

Carol Pizza, an economics teacher, explains, “It’s easy for these students to get the credit, go and buy a stereo, go and buy a television, go buy all this stuff that they want, and then all of sudden, they’re in a lot of debt.”

Pizza says parents can teach their kids about debt, bills and balancing a budget by giving them hands-on experience with the family finances.

“They need to encourage their child to help them with their bank statement every month, reconciling their checking account. Just let them be more involved; let your child know more about your finances, know how much your mortgage is a month.”

Pizza also suggests giving teens a credit card, but with strict spending limits, so they learn how easy and painless credit cards can be -- until they get the bill.

“We’re getting to the point where we’re almost in college and we’re going to be getting our credit cards,” says David, a high school student, “and if you get into a lot of debt then your parents are going to have to pay and you’re going have to pay, too, and it’s not going to be a good situation.”

Tips for Parents

Several factors, including the media, peers and personal successes and failures, influence children’s attitudes about work, money, spending and saving. But according to the National Council on Economic Education, parents exert the most influence on children’s ability to make sound financial decisions. Children need to see their parents practice sound money management – saving, budgeting and making rational (instead of impulsive) decisions about purchases. The Americans for Consumer Education and Competition suggests the following tips to help improve your child’s financial fitness:

Start financial education early by giving your child a weekly allowance.

Discuss the difference between “must have” purchases, such as school supplies, and “would like to have” purchases, such as a new video game.

Discuss family financial matters (family budget, routine shopping, purchase of a new car or home, planning a vacation, paying for college, etc.) with your child.

Discuss with your child his or her options when he or she receives a monetary gift (saving, investing, giving to charity, etc.).

Incorporate the media (newspaper articles, television, etc.) as a tool to educate your child about financial matters.

Work with your teen to develop a realistic budget. Set long- and short-term financial goals and the plans for achieving them.

Explain the advantages of waiting to make a purchase today, such as the latest gaming system, to save for another desired item, like a car or college education, tomorrow.

Promote shopping around before making purchases. This step generally assures a better deal and discourages impulse buying.

Use financial (checking account, credit card, etc.) statement reviews as a teaching aid to evaluate spending habits, promote sound financial practices and to instill fraud review practices.
Stress the importance of safeguarding personal and financial data, such as Social Security, personal identification (PIN) numbers and credit card information, as a means of preventing frauds like identity theft.

Foster charitable giving by urging your teen to donate some percentage of his/her allowance, however small, to the organization(s) of his or her choice.

References
The Americans for Consumer Education and Competition
National Council on Economic Education